Now it means I work, 20 days in a row, 10 hour days, go home, sleep, eat, do drugs, drink, smoke, club until 8AM and go straight to work continuing the "glamorous" lifestyle that is of a "londoner" where there is no time to stop, rest, fall in love, create friendships - be.
As you can tell I am not in the best of moods, let's blame it on January blues, weather, economy, anything else but the reality of just missing the recent experiences. I am not depressed, just a tiny bit uneasy.
Life has been okay, working a lot as per usual, not much new there, since the summer it's been pretty much the same, we have opened 2 more stores outside of London which has meant travels back and forth, shopfitting, training staff, etc. I still love it, though sometimes it wears me out to the point where I cannot function properly.
During late summer in 2011 I discovered a new clubbing scene right next to me, of course it was Vauxhall and especially places like Eagle and RVT. It has progressed me in a way, I have met many cool guys and people in general, more of my type, men, not girls with dicks. I felt like I fit in more, I never liked to lable myself or anyone else for that matter but you still end up doing so, you have your queens, bears, muscle Mary's, chubby's, etc. So yeah, I'm a cub I would say and have nothing wrong in admitting that.
The beginning of the second part of the year was crazy, I started going out every weekend and let's just say that since then I can tick off probably about 5 new types of drugs that I hadn't tried before. But it has been fun and I know my limits. I had a good one month break as well from all the partying, could of been the post operation blues (yeah, I got circumcised). Now that was an experience.
Also a few months ago learned another good lesson: never buy a ticket to the US to see a guy who you had a short LDR with 5 years ago, it doesn't work.
December gave me a nice early Christmas present. Met an italian, kissed the italian, went home with him, he ended up staying, slept, texts and calls, met his mates, he met mine, celebrated holidays, went clubbing, did drugs. But the italian recently got out of a 3,5 year relationship and needs his freedom to be, screw around, party the night away.
We talked and decided that it would be best that we take it easy and not see each other as much and as intensely. I'd like to say that I exploded in tears and cried and begged him to explain why but that is not me. I understood him completely, I find it absolutely in right when a person who comes out of a relationship takes time off to just be, do all he wants, screw around, go travelling on his own and just enjoy his own company.
So here I am, blaming it on January blues, weather, economy. When in reality I am just a boy who misses cuddles and kisses of another boy.
